My days that is. One passes, along comes the next and Ta-Daaaa, it's as if it's not even tomorrow! What a trickster! Tomorrow is yesterday, yesterday is today and today is tomorrow yesterday, only the calendar shows a different number, though the clock ticks amazing slow as it did today, or yesterday, or was it tomorrow? I get bored easily I think and living in a non active environment does me no good whatsoever. I think I may have closed myself up into a little shell, my little bubble which protects me from harsh reality - it's like my survival instinct know what I mean? Maybe it's just me. When I have no choice but to endure something I find it all to easy to hide away in my mind, my little world where everyone is frolicking through the meadows, smiling and laughing, it helps me cope and I don't lose my mind entirely. It's not that life is so terrible, just a little horridly unchallenging and I feel more and more anxious to get on with life. I will always have that unconditional love... thing going for my family, BUT I really think the clock has struck and I have squeezed every ounce of usefulness I could possibly have left in me and it is TIME. It has been time for a while now but the shackels of responsibilty I wore needed to be removed slowly so as not to upset the "equilibrium" (riiiiight). So yay, they're gone! Now the anxiousness of what's next is setting in, I am excited yet completely petrified. It is impossible for me to peer into the future like I once thought I was able to do. I wouldn't call myself any kind of soothsayer/prophet of course but I remember always having a clear picture of my life months and sometimes years ahead. Things of course wouldn't always work out just as I thought but I was able to, I guess you could say entertain a fantasy and thus would find comfort in that, somewhat childish I would say. But that ability is gooooone and tis a lil' freakay as I have no crutch. Ahhhhhh, I have no crutch!!! Is that called growing up?? hmmmmmmm HMMMMMMMM. So to further push myself into the realm of the unknown I AM HEADING WEST!! Come end of this month. I always seem to use 'finding crazy ass cheap air tickets' as my sign from the god's and waddayaknow, I found a crazy ass cheap ticket! So, ladies and gentlemen, stay tuned for more frolicking adventures from this wild child who is probably gonna have a string of tales - hopefully more happy than sad. Just 3 more weeks to go here in Denver, 3 more weeks of groundhog's day, let's all say a few extra prayers, cross our fingers and hope for the best.
anyhoo, my blog deserves a face lift. some cheerful polka-dots perhaps. they're all pretty shyte, I think blogger purposely uses poop templates to force us off of our lazy asses. I would get off mine but I don't really know where to go to study the art of HTML. I think it would be a great way to channel my dormant creativity, any help oh world of cyber?
8 comments:
Every blog needs a face-lift. I like yours!
I like your posts.
I hate to admit it, but I'm afraid of adventure. I hate that feeling of looking over the edge and seeing absolutely nothing.
But so far, you've done pretty well with yourself.
cool! CSS has one letter less than HTML so maybe things are easier there :D I think I'll play around next week as I'll be pretty much home alone which means TIME.
I know what you mean about the ledge Luch, though maybe it's something we'll all face one day in our lives and it will become only normal. For me the clarity of what lies ahead started slowly fading progressively and I haven't had much say in the matter!
waaah I hate you.. what's with the false advertising!! very misleading I feel so cheated :P
:D
Made ya look!!
Wait! Wait! Wait!
I am out of town and then off-line for a total of a week and all this stuff happens??
I know you are coming out here. I mean, you ARE staying with me. Teeheehee....
But I had no idea that it WAS indeed permanent!! Is you mom and fam really off to TX already? And you are ALONE in that house now??
No wonder you are going mad!
Hit me up with an email or or or... I need to be on line more.
Our internet is fixed so I will keep my eyes open for you!
Goooooood luck with your final days in Denver. We are alll eager to see you!!
Hooooold up. hehe. yeah we should talk but
#1 they are just gone for a week and will hopefully scope out some possibilities, BUT THEY'LL BE BACK. (life is not THAT good to me, hee hee)
#2 What is this word you use "permanent"? I'm not sure if that word is even in my vocabulary! Same plan as before though staying open to any possiblities.
Sorry. I misunderstood. I thought you were saying that they were already in TX so your services won't be needed anymore. Meaning that when you head out here for a visit, it would be permanent in the sense that you would not be going back to Denver.
But alas, I was wrong. So nevermind!
No problem! Hey were you at these days?? You're never online anymore... bleh BLEH! Missin' ya!
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