Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

No Title

hi hi hi hi hi!

being instant in season and out of season doesn't exactly apply to blogging. amazing how life can go from blogworthiness excitement to utter boredom and monotony - all the while you've been living "ground hogs day", how does your brain decide that suddenly everything's dull? That's not a serious question, I mean fine we can do a poll on it if you waaaant.

I guess a bit of news never hurt anyone.

I've been hurting my knees lately doing Tae Bo! Too much of the concentrated weight on one leg I am supposing. So I have switched over to jogging! So far I am doing just 2.5miles in around 35min. I know, pretty pathetic, but I do try. We live in a nice neighbourhood so it's safe enough to go out in the cool of the evening, gets me away from the madness and insanity!

Oh that reminds me, we might be shipping the "madness and insanity" (aka my family) off to their next mission field sooner than later! If they stay too much longer I can just foresee debt and further solidifying of the mud they seem to be slowly sinking into. So, Andrew and I are devising a scheme to get mom and the kids out and then Eman can hopefully stay and fundraise. Disappointing that they never seem to be elligible for the "windows of heaven" downpour and always need to be bailed out. Oh well, why else do you need your own children?

So I guess that means I will be sticking around the US of A for a bit longer, I don't mind really... I'm not "worried for my soul" - life here generally doesn't appeal to me, I don't think I have enough "systemite" qualities in me to want to become hardcore. I guess more than anything I am not so afraid of living life as it comes! It was a refreshing realization that came to me the other day, you don't HAVE to be a certain way if you don't WANT to be. I know that sounds basic but for some reason I had this perpetual cloud over my head like, "ohhh if I am not THIS way then the only other thing I can be is THAT way! whatever shall I do!?" This led to a prison of guilt and I started to despise life and everyone who seemed so happy living theirs. What if I didn't fit either (as if there were only two options) mold? Where do I fit in?!?! Yes, it was sad really and I don't mind getting a few "awwwwwwwww" comments as that would just warm my poor troublesome heart :) However, rest easy. I wouldn't say I am completely figured out in the head and have some mega plan for my life and where I will be. Lets just say I am not so scared to live it! Where will it be? Mexico? South America? Alaska? Saskatchewan? Europe? Only God knows but I think He'll let me in on His plan soon enough. So, Mexico, as much as I love you - I can't give you 100% guarantees that I'll be back to stay.

bitter-sweet... I hope that our friendships don't fade (they've always seemed to in the past) I suppose that's the risk that comes with "seeing the world", you do see it but you don't necessarily take a whole lot with you on the rest of your journey - except maybe just a few keepsakes - and goodbyes can very well be forever.

/hmmmmm

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Happy 28th oh sister of mine.

Just two shy of 30! Why do people get depressed about getting older, especially when they are still pretty young? Growing up is awesome! I mean, I still feel like a kid 99% of the time, maybe I just haven't yet had the whole merge into adulthood yet er sumthin'. Though I am thinking that could quite possibly be my nature and not something I am necessarily going to grow completely out of, is that possible? I could be 50 and skipping through the house instead of walking? I hope so. Wouldn't want to loose my pony-gallop... hmmm oh it's hard to describe really... something I figured out when I was 4 or so. Emma?? walking?? Yeeeeah right.

My sister and I are different that way. She's ALWAYS acted like the mature, responsible older sister she is and I have ALWAYS acted like the silly, crazy, irresponsible little sister I am. I don't think she ever had a hint of the same personality so I'm just thinkin' that maybe some people are destined to grow and become bonafide adults and some quite possibly aren't (?) Beats me really.

Now, I know there is a line there... somewhere. Of course we all you know, grow up and mature (or SHOULD!!)being too irresponsible and too childish are of course bad qualities as an adult having not yet crossed that ominous "maturity" line. But in completely abandoning your childlike side one can actually see how that can make aging depressing. I just think if you are young at heart, getting older isn't all that bad. At least you are having a good time getting through life, so who really cares about those numbers?

Happy Birthday! Be happy! Life is great!

Tuesday, June 14, 2005


boootiful Lena Posted by Hello

Things to do in Denver when you're dead


silly girls Posted by Hello

huh? Posted by Hello

grrrrrrrrr Posted by Hello

dominiqueeee Posted by Hello

aha! a yiiiiiittle six packeroo on the way! Posted by Hello

psshhhaaa... as if we were posing!! :) Posted by Hello

two nut-case sisters. Thea and Dominique Posted by Hello

somethin' er uther Posted by Hello

4 outta 8 Posted by Hello

when I first arrived Posted by Hello

reeeeeeed Posted by Hello

I looooooooooove love love loooooove my posters Posted by Hello

preseeeeeeenting... my lovely wall.


glorious red Posted by Hello

aaghhhhuugugghhhh Posted by Hello

it's about the wall really Posted by Hello

our mascot Posted by Hello

Sunday, June 12, 2005

I need a new template

Kristina thinks green is my colour. Like my "aura" or something about me says "you're all about green". Half my wardrobe is green, my eyes are green, plus I am a pisces! aha! somehow when I think of fish I think green... so there ya go!

Well I'll be!

"kinda sexy" takes a flying lead in my most important poll of all polls with a whopping 50 something %. Ok ok, so maybe only 15 or so people actually voted - but by jeeves! Pass me some friggin' ice cream thank you very much!! Naw, actually my brain has been wired such so as to not allow me really believe the poll with all my heart and soul, to where I actually lived and breathed to maintain my lovely love-handles. No sir! As much as you guys SAY you think they're kinda sexy, I don't personally agree. I really think I owe it to the male population at large to keep them as minimised as possible and the added plus is that I get to reap the benefits of being healthy! (ok that's dysfunctionalism at it's peak... I actually mentioned "health benefits" second.)

But you know? Maybe that's how it started for me, working out and all. I just got to the point where I was tired of always feeling fat and never being considered a person who takes care of herself. I wasn't even FAT FAT, but you know how it goes when you've never worked out a day in your life... everything jiggles and clothes rarely feel loose (except if you just got back from some two week long CTP trip, hiking through the Sierra, eating beans and tortillas alone - but that was only once a year and what with Costco and FOOOOOOD everywhere in most homes how could one possibly hope to stay slim and trim not working out?)

So in part it was a renewal goal for me and the other was, hey I wanna be sexy tooooooooooooo... haha YES, I ADMIT IT!!! But time has passed, I am staying pretty faithful to my mission and the serious pressure of wanting to loose loose loose is going (that would because I am giving up the notion of EVER being SKINNY, since I am not built that way) and now I just love to work out because it feels good! I love to jog, actually, it gets me out of the house, breathing fresh air and I feel it's maximum expenditure of energy per time spent working out so I'm getting my "moneys worth". I suppose the fear of going back to being the lazy bum I was is still there, though I see that as a positive fear that keeps me on track, wouldn't want my little deltoids or quads to go back to jigglish like they were.

"... well think about that when your flat on you back cuz you didn't get your hour or two of daily get out! da-da da-da da dada da-da da-da da dada... get your get out!" hee hee, wasn't that a groovy song?

Friday, June 10, 2005

BTW

you should participate in my poll. I voted "slim and trim" to test it out, but if you're a chick don't vote as it'll just mess up my statistics here. this is serious stuff :) BE HONEST! DON'T JUST PUT ANY OL' THANG!!

This isn't life in the fast lane, it's life in the oncoming traffic!!

I know I've been a bit out of touch lately, been busy trying to keep myself from going insane that's all :) No really, it's just been awfully hectic and proof of this fact - I am up, attempting to post something on my blog at 1am... we'll see what happens. I shall first enjoy myself a glass of wine on this gloriously quiet eve. I love this time of night! The noise of children and life in general has subsided, I just hear the subdued sound thunder in the distance from the passing storm,(oh yeah, it snowed, in friggin' JUUUUUUNE! but just a wee bit) and the humm of the dishwasher.

Part one of thie weeks madness started when Dominique and I took on the painting-the-house challenge! It's been fun, I've given over to my urge to express the 'fauvist' side of me - a bit to my muther's dismay, she wouldn't have us painting the house wineish-burgundyish red... that was to be kept to the confines of my bedroom. Let me tell you, it is now one FINE looking room. Property value itself has most likely increased if not doubled! I am very pleased with the outcome. I just hate detail! I love to twirl around with the roller and brush, set the paint to the wall in the most absurd and (most likely) wrong way possible, I like to get all messy, but I hate painstakingly attending to the trim, the skirting boards and then CLEANING UP! UGH! (I was raised with maids, I tell you it's not my fault!!)

The rest of the house is white and beige, nothing to expound on there other than THAT was deathly painstaking to paint. boring.

It's been a funeral, house make-over, ballooning, kids, and then just trying to stay on top of my own 'battles' - working out, staying sane, and just trying the heck to figure my life out this week. ecch. I even failed in my little 'determination' endevour this week, wtf is my problem?!

/sigh, hopeless, sleepy, 'under-the-influence'... no wine and computer for me aaaanymore! I do and say stupid things.

oh well.

Good night!