Nothing in my way

I've been stressed out lately over life... huh what's new? hehe. No it's been more of a crisis of so much to do, so hard to know what to start with and my feelings of inadequecy in regards to starting and completing something new. I always psyche myself out before I even start and the thought of taking that first step makes me quiver in fright. Amusingly, I have NOT yet learned that EVERY single time this has happened [and you know it has... frequently] not only did I prove to myself that it could be done but it was actually pretty easy! I have a couple things stewing for me... correction: a couple things that I plan to have stewing... ahem. I feel like a year is a good milestone time to look back at what you've done and how you've grown/learned and to look forward to where you could be if you just kept on the path you've been on. Well, I really feel like I need to up the ante and give myself some NEW challenge. That's right boys and girls, time for some drastic changes!!! Oh you know I love them!! lol. Ok, well I am actually going to be a little drastic in a way that goes against my personailty and that is to not pack up and leave JUST YET but to instead invest in the time I am here in going to school! I'm really excited about the prospect of being in an environment that challenges me (having a job does the oposite), being around people who ENJOY discussing the deeper issues of life and I also want to improve my Spanish most importantly. I realize that I AM in America and the educational system is notorious for churning out retards...but man, there've got to be a few out there who are like me in some way!!! :) So yeah, this is all kinda major for me considering I have not looked at a school book in over 10 years - even if I don't learn anything new I think I will be happy to relearn everything I've since forgotten. hehe.

AND I am pretty sick of the service industry, it's sooooooooooooo.... pointless?? I don't see the need to make a career out of serving food to people... it's ok for now but it's not for me. I'm like, go cook your own food if your gonna demand I refill your glass of water so rudely. Oh my gosh! Funny thing that I've noticed. SO the place I work: The Old Spaghetti Factory (Family-style restaurant) serves probably some of worst food nutrionally ever served other than a TV dinner (think Gourmet Italian Pasta... but the oposite) It's affordable and not horrible to the taste buds, but really - eat there often and your arteries will start clogging. So we get these FAAAAT guests who of course LOVE our HEARTY (think "super size") value meals. So what do they do? They order EXTRA cheese, EXTRA butter, a loaf of bread or 2 each AND THEN........... this is the part that I look at them with a very sympathetic look in my eye.... and then they order no not a regular coke, but a DIET coke!!! It's like never mind that they are eating enough food to feed a small country for a day, they really think that drinking this horrendously espartame filled drink is going to *somehow* help them not gain quite as much weight from this marathon meal they frequently eat. :rolls eyes:

Ok I have not been taking pics much lately but here's one of me and the boy... I was going for the "I'm pissed that you are trying ot take my picture look" but I think I cam eout looking rather wasted... he looks kinda yummy tho :)

I'll take some better ones this weekend since I've got some time on my hands! Promise! Ok time to go and claim the rest of this day with soem good accomplishments.

somuchloveandhugs

missyoubye