I forgot to mention: I AM OFF TO MEXICO (for a week)!!! *bounces around the room*
I'm so excited as it's been too long and I am long over due. Close to a year and a half ago I was living a different life in the heart of Mexico. Not sure how it's going to be, but I have a feeling I will be very torn between leaving there again and wanting to stay. Mexico holds many memories close to my heart, a lot of happiness and wonderful times. I had a rough last 6 months there and pretty much decided I must not be cut out for that life. Among many things life seemed to become much more complicated, I felt my lovely simple life was slipping away. It wasn't that I had lost faith in what I was doing there, I had lost faith in myself in doing the things that were seeming to be required of me, or expected of me. One day in October I found myself driving the 3 day journey to Denver, CO where I was to be for a month visiting family and return....... I never returned.
I find myself today, in the throws of being twenty-something, questioning and trying to understand. Wanting to try, yet already feeling like a failure. Silent scream, virtual reality, bitter sweet, calculated spontaneity, calm storm, mildly psychotic, rebel without a cause... Life lived in an oxymoron!
Much I want to see, much I fear to know. Will the haunting always be?
Ah, what the hell! Life... gimme yer best shot!!
6 comments:
aww thanks Loxy. It's easy to feel that way, but I know we all go through this - somehow we do come out alive! I plan to have a great time, there are some great guys I am gonna be visiting - so worth it!
counting down the days
It's gonna be great to see you again!
counting down the days aswell! It's been some time hasn't it Mig? Yet I still feel like just yesterday I was there. Can't wait to see you too! :)
Are you flying?
I hate the word faliure. I feel like one too and i'm just getting started.
...It's all in your head...
found myself reminiscing on this today...
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